Spelling and grammar.
It was pretty good for a first, however, if you can't make a movie with sound, you have to work a little harder on the dialogue. Some of what was said simply wasn't realistic. There were many spelling and grammatical errors as well.
The graphics were decent, and the story flowed well.
Despite my beef with all the typing, I am voting to protect.
O.k. I got you!
Thanks a lot for the help.
Neat.
It's cool to see an experimental (or at least I thought so) piece make it to the front page. Some of it reminded me of the "Rejected" video, and I don't doubt that you were influenced by it.
Although it was short, I quite enjoyed your submission. However, my one problem was the sound. It was used very well, and I have no problem with noise for art, but the quality was lacking and left something to be desired (especially the ending song - my ears hurt).
Overall an interesting piece.
Needs work.
You can do it, but it will take a while. Patience is a virtue, especially when it comes to making flash.
First of all, learn to optimize your audio so the filesize isn't so large.
I would say you should animate the story rather than narrating it because you will have more time with the song, and the ending will be more powerful. To elaborate, SHOW him being discriminated against and coming to the end of his path.
It's not good to have the song keep running at the end. Doesn't look professional at all. A replay function would be nice.
Use spell check if you have to and fix out all the typos. Maybe use a more appealing font.
Now that I've given you something to work with, go out and fix this puppy up.
Good.
I'd say you did a pretty good job because I don't usually like sprite movies much, but I enjoyed this one quite a bit. Made me smile. Keep it up.
Good slapstick.
It had all the elements required for the genre. Even with the violence, you maintained a light mood with the music. Well done. My only complaint is regarding the credit music. I just feel like it didn't suit the film very well, and also the quality seemed to be a little low (crackling). But that could just be my crappy PC.
A job well done.
Very nice.
Excellent job. Very nicely drawn and animated. Coldplay is one of the few good pop bands out right now so I'm glad it wasn't a "Paris Hilton" (I doubt it's really her) song or something. There was a good flow and it was very professional.
My one suggestion would be: Maybe you shouldn't refer to yourself in the third person in your comments because if you are indeed the creator of this work, people will falsely believe it is stolen.
lol
Great job. I loved it - well written and executed. Good looking, nice voice acting, memorable characters. Very funny. Keep it up.
I liked it.
Very well done, especially within a 24-hour time frame. My only complaint might be the sound. Maybe it was too crisp or something - especially at the end. Either way, I still enjoyed it and hope to see more.
P.S. The eyes looked fine to me :)
Much better than last time.
I blammed it last time because it was too short. You do have animating talent, and although this one was still a little on the small side, it was worth voting through in my opinion. Keep it up me likey.
Thx :D
Damn funny..
..but you should have continued it. I can really see this being a long random story with no sense to it, but I felt it ended ubruptly and too suddenly. Great job on the voices and animation. I loved it.
I am the video word made flesh.
Age 35, Male
Montreal
Joined on 2/15/04
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